What is your name?

A few months ago, I got a call from my friend Johanna's office phone. "My purse was stolen - call me." Naturally, I called her back right away. Someone picked up who clearly wasn't her and whose voice I didn't recogniz,e asking me who I was. "Who is THIS?" I asked. "Who is this? I asked you first!" the voice said. I racked my brain...who could be in the office that sounds like this? All the sudden I realized...Johanna's office phone always forwards to her cell..this was the guy that had stolen the purse! My heart raced and my mind sped up. What do I say?? I thought. "Are you talking on a phone that is not yours?" I asked. "It's mine now - I found it!" he said. "You didn't find it - you took it from my friend, and she is really worried about getting it back!" "Well, what is she going to give me for it?" The voice said. I lightheartedly said "You can't sell something that is not yours!" "Well, why don't you meet me and give me some money for it!" I just laughed and said "Now come on! Didn't you hear me? You can't sell something that is not yours! I have a friend who owns a liquor store downtown - can you come leave it here? I will tell you how to get there. You take the green line to Adams and La..." click. No he didn't just hang up on me! I rang and rang and rang until the voice picked up again. "Don't you know that it is rude to hang up on someone who is talking to you!?" I scolded. "You were taking too long!" the voice complained (not the first time I have heard this, mind you!) "Well, I wasn't done. I was telling you how to get to the liquor store to drop off my friend's stuff. Like I said, just take the green line..." then a mumbling...and some other voices and...click. Again - there was no way I was letting him go this easy! I rang and rang and didn't get an answer...so I rang her cell number directly and... "hello?" the voice answered! "I thought I told you before that it is rude to hang up on people who are talking to you!"I, again, scolded. "I thought you heard me say hold on a minute!" the voice said, sounding apologetic. "Ok, but you should have let me finish!" So he did, and actually agreed to return it. Our interaction had brought me to feelings of pity and almost endearment toward him, this nameless voice on the phone. "What is your name?" I gently asked. "Tease" was the only reply that I got. Laughing, I said "Well, Ok "tease", thank you for agreeing to return the stuff."

When I finally got a chance to talk to Johanna, I found out that it wasn't just two kids playing around, it was two guys with a gun, two guys who had been pretty agressive with her. I realized that "Tease" really was teasing...and there was no way that the stuff would be returned.

The interaction was an important one for me, however. Here was a person who went from villan to person, from "voice" to having a name...even if he didn't give me his real one. The mugging happened in broad daylight, right around the area I'm looking to move in only 2 short months. It was a reminder that though broken people do broken things, they have names, they have faces...they have hearts that are broken and in need of God's love.

My dad sent the following email to Johanna only days later:

this is why we go there

this is the darkness
people live there
people don't want to live in darkness but they are trapped
do we leave them to die alone?
no, we go there, to be with them. this is the gospel. this is exactly what God did for us in the darkness- He came to BE with us, and it cost him his life.
like in the reformation, by becoming baptized we are marked men and women- a price on our heads. it is paul, gaining consciousness and marching back into lystra. we are baptized into a "take up your cross and follow me" faith. following jesus meant probably getting killed.
did you read shane where he was asked, "aren't you afraid, living in the inner city?" He replied, "I'm more afraid of the suburbs." where christians can live peaceable lives, unhindered, unchallenged- little risk, and growing comfortable with denying the pain of the world around us.
ask hannah about what julius said, when a girl from the youth group was freaking out as we walked by the crack house. she sensed that she was no longer in her safe existence and he comforted her with these words (a 15 year old black boy from the hood who knew what it all boils down to- the root of all security and insecurity-) "Don't worry- they can only kill your body."

i am so proud of you for who you are and what you stand for and pray that this experience will just grow your compassion for the troubled souls out there who are so desperate. pray daily for the guy who took your stuff. he does not realize that God directed his path to a child of God... God's greatest hope for him is that he would have what you have- pray daily for him.

mostly we don't fear because we have not experienced the horror
it's really not faith, but probabilities
when our car was stolen, we would either learn to be paranoid about locking the car
or learn that we could live fine without a car. we learned that something we feared a little happened to us and we still did fine. and in response to satan, i don't just not curse, not fear, but i do praise. i figure the best way to get back at satan is to respond to anything sent my way that is designed to topple me- i'll just respond with praise.

don't feel bad if you have some ptsd... or need some time to regain your nerve. but just don't refuse to get back on the horse, and for now, surround yourself with people who love you and hold you up and understand why you are working/volunteering there in the first place.

and here is a good theme song for a time like this:
steve camp
living dangerously in the hands of god
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vbmsq1soVio

love you
rusty and mary lou

i hope you learn not to be afraid

and then, God...

broke my heart for what breaks His